
In what feels like another lifetime, I was a CPA. People constantly asked me about taxes, even though, I had little to do with taxes and, in most cases, knew less than they did. But if you’re a CPA you must know taxes, right? This is the human-way of categorizing people. If you are an X you must know this. Even though in a large category of work there will be entirely different skills being used. So I was mostly a Controller or CFO during my accounting days, and I would hire someone to do taxes.
Now if I tell people I’m an author, their first question is “what do you write?” In my case that would be mysteries. After that, there is very little discussion. Most people seem to accept that writing is something you do. but they cannot ask about it because they’re not real sure how you do it. They write, of course, but writing a 300-page book is not in their realm of possibilities.
On occasion I will self-describe myself as an artist. This seems to illicit frowns. I think most people think artists are dead-beats; but, of course, would not want to say that to your face.
There are many things in our country which could use a little attention. Health care, justice system, housing, –well it’s a fairly long list. One of the most obvious is the tax code. You know why most CPA’s don’t know much about taxes? It’s because you have to spend full-time, every day to keep up with this ever-increasing monstrosity.
If you would like to read, (I would not advise it) some of the most confusing legal bullshit ever, the hundreds of pages regarding taxing of acquisitions would be perfect. Even simple subjects like depreciation have become convoluted messes. Now this is for businesses, not “normal” people. These thousands of pages, often written to impact only one company, are why we have huge corporations who report record profits to Wall Street, and their stock soars, but pay zero income taxes.
If you’re a corporatist person and think that what is good for corporations is good for the rest of us, you might think this is okay. But it is not.
There are exceptions, but the companies that take the most advantage of these “loopholes” are highly active political contributors. What does that say? It says that if I give you money, I expect a return. Does your congressperson or Senator understand these tax laws—hell no! Only the very top tax attorney and tax CPAs even begin to understand this pile of smoldering corruption.
So, let’s just run the numbers. I’m CEO Big Shot and my company needs a special consideration to write-off our entire investment in some necessary plant upgrade because we are polluting the river next to our plant and facing stiff fines. I go to my Senators and Congressmen with money in hand and suggest a special tax code provision that will allow companies to write-off this type of equipment over one year if it is improving the local river water. Senator X puts out a news release saying he is backing this change because his buddy Mr. Big Shot is so eager to help clean up the local river. Everybody’s a hero. Because of the way Big Shot’s company records income, they are able to shove huge amounts of income in the year they spend large bucks on the plant up-grade and save millions in taxes. Of course, the investment was required in order to stay in business, and the river needed cleaning up because of the company—but a tax break for business is never looked at closely; so, who cares.
When I was the CFO or Controller, almost daily the owner or CFO or head-honcho would approach me about ways to make the numbers look better. These upstanding people would not even think about stealing a candy bar, but they would cheat to improve their “numbers” anyway they could. Were they bad people? I came to believe they were—even though, in most cases, I liked them as people.
I left that corporate world disillusioned. My next jobs were in the investment banking world. Everyone I met there was working some sort of scheme. The biggest difference is that these people knew they were cheating; and didn’t give a shit. I wasn’t disillusioned just a little sick.
Yes, in case you’re wondering I have just started my tax return for last year. It’s this time of year I start to envy Mr. Big Shot.
On a personal note; at a certain age when we have one health problem it often leads to others. My broken knee has led to some other issues I’m currently dealing with; all fixable, just annoying. So the blog has slowed down again. Maybe the Spring will get me back to full production. Thanks for sticking with me!






















